Sex og graviditet

Sex and pregnancy

Josefine Valentina

Josefine Valentina er jordemoderstuderende og passioneret omkring menstruation, krop, fødsel og seksualitet. Hun ønsker at skabe rum, hvor disse emner bliver aftabuiserede, og hvor der er plads til alle nuancer.

Sex og graviditet

Are you curious about how to get started with your sex life after pregnancy and childbirth? Read on!

Wait until you really want to 

Try not to think about society's expectations of having sex again after a certain number of weeks. Maybe you feel like it pretty soon after the birth, maybe it takes a very long time. Both are perfectly ok. All bodies are different. And the desire can of course also depend on a lot of things, such as how the experience of your birth has been, whether you are swollen and whether there are ruptures that are still healing. It can be nice to communicate with your partner about it, so you can share your feelings and thoughts about your "new" sex life with each other.

Start with yourself

After a pregnancy and birth, it can feel different to be caressed than it did before. For some especially inside the vagina. It can therefore be nice to start by touching yourself and getting to know your "new" body, understanding what feels good and what does not feel good before you are intimate with your partner.

Stay-at-home dates or do things together that renews your energy

Your relationship can easily become all about diaper changes and who should make dinner, and it's not always easy to prioritize the relationship with a sweet little new one. But a stay-at-home date once in a while can be a great way to prioritize the relationship with a newborn. You can try to plan a few hours once a week, where you do something together and see if it works for you. Eat some good food together, light candles, play a game or do a relaxing activity that you both enjoy. If you feel turned on by the things you do together outside the bedroom, it often comes more natural to want sex.

It might feel different than before

You have given birth to a child and your body has undergone an amazing transformation and is therefore not the same body as before - in a good way. Invite the new sensations and senses in. Start out slow and give each other all the time it takes. Pay attention to what you feel like. Maybe just touching your body, maybe the vulva, maybe in the vagina, but try not to have many expectations for how it should be, but instead follow your body and its sensations. Your body will tell you what it needs and wants if you listen to it. If you are still bleeding, there is an increased risk of infection up to the uterus. You must therefore pay extra attention to hygiene, and if you and your partner want to have penetration sex with either fingers or penis, it is recommended to use a condom.

If you need to use the clitoral stimulator, it should be emphasized that it may be a good idea to try it after first caressing the area with your fingers. I think it is a good idea to try without vibrations first, as it can all feel very different, and then, when you have felt your "new" body, start trying stimulator after. Start by feeling with your fingers and see how it feels. And if you feel like it, you can try a clitoral stimulator, which emits a pulsating pressure on the clitoris.

Remember that it's ok if the first time you try being intimate with your partner after childbirth, it doesn't turn into sex. Maybe you were not quite ready anyway or maybe the baby wakes up and cries in the middle of it all. Do not try to take it too seriously, even though it may be difficult. It will come.

Follow Josefine Valentina's work here.

Read our article "Do you also have difficulty achieving orgasm?" here.

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