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5 tips to spice up missionary

The missionary position is probably the most common, but also the most basic position when it comes to penetrative sex. The classic missionary is also great in its own right, but there are several different ways you can make it a little different (and maybe a little better). Read our 5 tips for trying out the missionary position in new ways

1. bondage elements

If you're interested in bondage, missionary can be a great position to try it out. With bondage tape, cuffs or ropes, you can restrain the receiving party either around the wrists, ankles or both. For example, the receiving party can lie on their back and have their arms secured above their head or to the headboard. You can also add a blindfold for an extra kinky element.

When trying bondage, remember to set expectations with your partner(s) first. Bondage is a loss of control, and it's important to trust and be able to talk to your partner(s) about the experience - before, during and after.

Also remember that the restraints should not be too tight. As a general rule, you should be able to fit 2 fingers between ropes, tape or whatever you use.

2. Lift the leg

When you, as the receiving party, are lying on your back, you can lift one leg and place it over your partner's shoulder. This will give you a different angle and depth of penetration. If you are flexible enough, you can also put both legs on your partner's shoulders.

3. Use a pillow

Another way to achieve deeper penetration is to place a pillow under your hips or buttocks. If you're a person with a vulva, your abdomen will be lifted up and rotated in this position, making it easier to hit the G-zone. It can be an added advantage to use a wand vibrator while in this position, as there is more room to stimulate the clitoris when you are lifted up. 

4. Engage different erogenous zones

In the missionary position, there is great opportunity to create a very intimate, erotic experience because you can both lie close and maintain eye contact during sex. It's therefore ideal to focus on other sensations and ways of stimulation than just penetration.

For many, the neck, ears and nipples are sensitive areas that can be stimulated with touching, kissing or other massage. For many people with vulva, the labia are also very sensitive and can be stimulated along the way with fingers or the tip of the penis. 

5. Dirty talk

Because you are lying close and can look into each other's eyes, it can also be arousing to add a little dirty talk. Dirty talk can be many different things, and if you're a beginner, it can be hard to know what to say.

It can feel a little awkward if you're not used to dirty talk, so starting simple can help. For example, you can give compliments or say if your partner does something that feels nice. Once you feel more comfortable, you can be more explicit in your compliments or say what you want your partner to do to you. 

Also, feel the mood. Sometimes it suits the mood if dirty talk is more risqué, while other times it should be more sensual or romantic. Since missionary is a slightly more intimate position, sensuality may be the obvious choice, but of course it's completely individual. You can also read more in our guide to dirty talk here.

Read also: What is sexual aftercare?

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