10 tips for giving a handjob
A handjob is when you use your hands to stimulate the penis. You can do this either on yourself or on your partner(s). Many people refer to handjobs as having hand sex or jerking off.
Why give handjobs?
You might be inclined to think that a handjob is less interesting to your partner(s) than oral sex - especially because hand sex will often be the way your partner(s) have sex with themselves. Some people may feel that they can't do it as well as their partner can, and therefore don't bother giving a handjob. However, receiving a handjob from someone else is a completely different experience. You can take advantage of the knowledge your partner(s) have about themselves and ask them to tell you how they like to receive a handjob. We've put together ten tips and tricks to get you started.
1. use both hands
When giving a handjob, you usually use one hand to run up and down the shaft of the penis. You can use the other hand too - either by using both hands on the shaft or by stimulating other erogenous zones while doing so. For example, you could try massaging the perineum, the prostate through the anus, the scrotum, the inner thighs or something else. Try it out and ask your partner what feels good to them.
2. Lube it up
You can easily jerk off your partner(s) without adding lube - but the friction can feel uncomfortable. Therefore, it's a good idea to add lube or saliva when giving a handjob - it will make things go a little smoother.
3. Start off gently
Not everyone likes the same kind of stimuli - thankfully! You can always turn up the intensity, so it's best to start gently and build up as you go. It can be exciting to explore and identify different areas where your partner likes to be touched. This way, you'll expand your options for how many different ways you can combine stimuli.
4. Focus on the frenulum
The frenulum (which is the string behind the penis head) and the area around it is often a particularly nice place to be stimulated. Try applying extra pressure to the area as you move your hand up and down the shaft. You can also try putting some saliva on your thumb and stimulate the area in a focused way by moving up and down or in circles. When your hand reaches the head of the penis, you can also twist your wrist to prolong the stimulation of the frenulum.
5. try edging
To really explore how great hand sex can be, you can try your hand at edging. In short, it's all about repeatedly stimulating either yourself or your partner(s) to near orgasm. It can be a fun challenge to a partner through hand sex only. You can also make it extra spicy by incorporating restraints or a blindfold.
6. Squeeze the root and/or scrotum
By squeezing relatively hard around the root of the penis, the scrotum or both, you can increase sensitivity. Squeeze around with two fingers - not your whole hand, and use your other hand to run up and down the shaft. You can also try timing it so that you squeeze more as your partner comes. This may make your partner's orgasm feel more intense or they may be able to achieve multiple orgasms in a row. Being squeezed around the root and/or scrotum is definitely not for everyone, so start gently and feel your way through.
7. Use sex toys for the penis
In addition to your hand, you can also use a penis ring to keep pressure on the root and/or scrotum. If you want to try vibration, you can use this vibrating stroker - add some lube and let your partner experience a (perhaps) new kind of stimulation during a handjob. There are also penis sleeves; they have a soft and massaging texture and create a vacuum similar to a blowjob.
8. Try out new positions
A handjob is often associated with the recipient lying down while the person giving the hand job sits next to or on top of them. It's a good idea to think creatively and try out new positions when giving a handjob. For example, ask your partner to stand up and position yourself behind them while you jerk them off. You can also sit on top of their chest with your back to their face so they can't see what's going on.
10. Communicate along the way
Pay attention to your partner's reactions when you give them a handjob. Figure out how to make it the most enjoyable for them. As well as reading their facial expressions and body language, you can also communicate with them verbally. Ask them how they like it. It can be difficult to describe when something feels good, so it's a good idea to ask them more specific questions. Ask them if you should do it faster, slower, gentler or harder. You can also try asking your partner to guide your hands to where it feels best for them.
You may want to start the communication either before or at the very beginning of the act. There's a risk that it can be harder to guide your partner if you're worried that it could be interpreted as criticism.
Read also: Guide to masturbation for people with a penis
Read also: Vibrators for the penis
